A Parent’s Guide to Executive Function Coaching for Twice-Exceptional (2e) Children
- Sean McCormick
- Sep 10
- 11 min read
Updated: Oct 16
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Meet Sarah, a 10-year-old who can calculate complex mathematical equations in her head and beat adults at chess.
Yet every morning, she forgets her backpack, loses her homework, and melts down when asked to organize her room.
Her parents watch in frustration as their brilliant daughter struggles with tasks that seem simple, even second nature, to other children her age.
Sarah represents thousands of twice-exceptional children who live at the intersection of giftedness and learning challenges.
These remarkable kids possess extraordinary talents while simultaneously facing significant obstacles with executive function skills, which are the mental tools that help us plan, organize, and manage daily tasks.
If you’re a parent of a 2e child and aren’t sure what steps you should take next, this guide is for you.
We’ll explain what exactly makes 2e children unique, how coaching addresses their specific needs, and discuss some practical steps you can take to access this valuable support through school or private options.
Understanding the Twice-Exceptional Mind
Twice-exceptional children are those possessing both intellectual giftedness along with one or more learning differences or disabilities.
This dual nature creates a unique cognitive profile that can be puzzling for parents and educators alike.
2e children might excel in creative writing, for instance, but struggle with handwriting mechanics, or demonstrate advanced reasoning skills while having difficulty with basic organization.
The Unique Strengths of 2e Children
Your 2e child likely displays remarkable abilities that set them apart from their peers.
They often show advanced problem-solving skills, thinking outside conventional boundaries to find creative solutions.
Many demonstrate exceptional memory for topics that interest them, absorbing complex information with ease.
Their emotional sensitivity, while sometimes challenging, often translates into deep empathy and understanding of others.
They frequently display intense curiosity, asking probing questions that reveal sophisticated thinking patterns.
Common Executive Function Challenges for 2e Children
Despite their intellectual gifts, 2e children often struggle with executive function skills that seem automatic for other children.
They may have difficulty breaking large projects into manageable steps, leading to overwhelming feelings and procrastination.
Time management frequently poses challenges.
Your child might become so absorbed in a fascinating activity that they lose track of time completely, making transitions difficult and schedules nearly impossible to maintain.
Organization. That, too, can feel like an insurmountable obstacle.
Backpacks become black holes where assignments disappear, and bedrooms might look like tornado zones despite their parents' best efforts to establish systems.
And last but not least, working memory issues mean your child might forget multi-step instructions or lose track of what they were doing midway through a task.
This creates a cycle of frustration for both children and parents, especially combined with any of the other executive functioning issues mentioned above.
Why Executive Function Matters for 2e Children
Executive function skills are important for everyone, but especially so for 2e children, as they serve as the bridge between your child's remarkable intellectual potential and their ability to actually demonstrate that potential in real-world settings.
Without strong executive function skills, even the brightest children struggle to succeed academically and socially.
These skills become increasingly important as children progress through school.
Elementary assignments might be forgiving of disorganization, but middle and high school demand greater independence and self-management.
Notably, for 2e children, executive function challenges can mask their true abilities.
Teachers might focus on missing assignments or behavioral issues rather than recognizing the gifted mind struggling beneath the surface.
The Role of Executive Function Coaching for 2E Students
Executive function coaching differs significantly from traditional tutoring or therapy.
Rather than focusing on specific academic content or processing emotional issues, coaching targets the fundamental skills that enable learning and daily functioning.
Coaches work collaboratively with children to identify their unique strengths and challenges.
They help children develop personalized strategies that work with their brain's natural patterns rather than fighting against them.
The coaching relationship also emphasizes growth and possibility.
Children learn to view their challenges as puzzles to solve rather than permanent limitations, which helps to build their overall resilience and self-confidence.
How the Coaching Process Works
EF coaching typically begins with a comprehensive assessment to understand your child's specific executive function profile.
This might involve:
questionnaires
observations
informal assessments
These reveal patterns of strength and challenge.
Together, the coach and child identify specific, achievable goals.
Rather than vague objectives like "get organized," they might focus on concrete targets like,
Pack backpack using a checklist every evening.
or
Break homework into 15-minute chunks with breaks.
The sessions often feel more like collaborative problem-solving than traditional instruction.
Coaches might use games, visual tools, and hands-on activities to make skill-building engaging and memorable, practicing skills in real-life contexts rather than abstract exercises.
Key Skills Addressed Through Coaching
Some skills addressed during EF coaching include:
Planning and organization: Ideally with a focus on developing systems to match a student’s learning style. A visual learner might use color-coded calendars, while a kinesthetic learner might benefit from physical organization systems they can manipulate, like a student dashboard which is featured in my semester success blueprint course.
Time management: Learning to estimate how long tasks actually take through hands-on timing exercises, developing personal strategies for tracking time and managing transitions between activities.
Task initiation: Knowing what to do but struggling to start. EF coaches might help students identify personal motivation patterns and develop starting rituals that work consistently.
Emotional regulation and self-monitoring: Recognizing emotional states and implementing strategies before meltdowns occur. EF coaches help kids develop personal toolkits for managing frustration, anxiety, and overwhelm.
Benefits of Executive Function Coaching for 2E Students
In case you’re not yet convinced, here are a few reasons why EF coaching shines for 2E students:
Academic Success That Reflects Their True Ability
If you feel that your child’s academic performance doesn’t align with your child’s intellectual capabilities, executive function coaching could be the answer.
For a deep dive into executive function coaching, check out my article Executive Function Coaching: The Definitive Guide (2025).
When children can organize their materials, manage their time, and approach complex projects systematically, their grades often improve dramatically.
Parents frequently report that homework battles diminish significantly.
Children who once spent hours on assignments they could complete in minutes develop efficient work habits that reduce family stress.
Better yet, these skills tend to transfer across subjects and grade levels.
A child who learns effective note-taking strategies in fifth grade continues using and refining those skills throughout their academic career.
Enhanced Emotional Well-Being
Perhaps most importantly, children develop confidence in their ability to handle challenges.
Instead of feeling overwhelmed by their differences, they begin to see themselves as capable problem-solvers.
The chronic frustration that many 2e children experience starts to decrease.
When they have tools to manage their challenges, daily tasks become less stressful and more manageable.
Practical Life Skills for Long-Term Success
Executive function coaching addresses skills that extend far beyond the classroom.
Children learn to manage their personal spaces, maintain friendships, and handle increasing independence as they mature.
Improved Family Relationships
Many parents describe a transformation in their home environment after their child begins executive function coaching.
Daily conflicts over forgotten assignments, lost items, and incomplete chores decrease significantly.
Parents can shift from constantly managing their child's responsibilities to supporting their child's growing independence.
Siblings benefit too, as family time becomes more enjoyable when it's not dominated by executive function-related conflicts and crisis management.
Advocating for Executive Function Coaching in Your Child's IEP
An Individualized Education Program (IEP) provides legally mandated support for children with documented disabilities.
Many 2e children qualify for IEPs based on their learning differences, even when their intellectual giftedness complicates the picture.
IEPs must address your child's unique needs through specific, measurable goals and appropriate services.
Executive function coaching can be included as a related service when it's necessary for your child to benefit from their education.
Make sure the IEP team considers your child's strengths as well as their challenges.
For 2e children, this means developing a plan that nurtures their gifts while providing necessary support for their learning differences.
Building a Strong Case for Coaching Services
Document, document, document.
Gather examples of how executive function challenges impact your child's academic performance and school functioning and how coaching might be able to help.
This might be through:
teacher observations
work samples
assessment results
All of these can be used to demonstrate the gap between your child's intellectual potential and their current performance (and show why traditional accommodations might not be sufficient).
Focus on specific, observable behaviors rather than general concerns.
Instead of saying your child is "disorganized," provide examples like
"loses homework assignments three times per week despite completing them"
or
"requires multiple prompts to begin independent work tasks."
Collaborating Effectively with School Teams
Approach IEP meetings as collaborative problem-solving sessions rather than adversarial negotiations.
Present executive function coaching as a solution that benefits everyone by helping your child access their education more effectively.
Come prepared with research about executive function coaching and its effectiveness for 2e children.
Share specific coaching models or approaches that align with your child's needs and your school's resources.
Be open to creative solutions.
Executive function support might be provided through existing school personnel, contracted services, or modified approaches that address similar goals.
Private Coaching: When and How to Pursue It
School-based support, though valuable, may not always meet your 2e child's comprehensive needs and may not be provided by someone specifically trained in executive functioning.
Private coaching offers more intensive, individualized support that can complement or supplement school services.
You may want to consider private coaching if your child needs more frequent sessions than schools can provide, requires specialized expertise in 2e issues, or would benefit from coaching that extends beyond the school environment.
Not only that, but some children respond better to coaching from someone outside the school system.
The neutral relationship can feel less threatening and more collaborative than school-based interventions.
Finding the Right Coach for Your Child
Look for coaches with specific training in executive function and experience working with gifted children with learning differences.
General life coaching may not address the unique needs of 2e children effectively.
Instead, look for someone with specific coaching training and experience in executive function.
Ask potential coaches about their approach to working with 2e children.
They should understand the unique challenges these children face and have strategies that build on strengths while addressing weaknesses.
Begin with an initial consultation to assess the fit between your child and potential coaches.
This meeting should help you understand the coach's approach and determine whether your child feels comfortable with their style.
Next, together you should establish clear goals and expectations for coaching.
While flexibility is important, having specific targets helps everyone track progress and adjust the methods and approaches as needed.
If you're ready to explore executive function coaching for your child, the EF Specialists team can help. Click here to book a no-cost inquiry call.
Taking the Next Step for Your 2e Child
Parenting a 2e child can be challenging, but incredibly rewarding.
The combination of intellectual giftedness and learning challenges creates unique opportunities and obstacles that require specialized support.
Your child's brilliant mind deserves tools that help it function effectively in daily life.
Executive function coaching provides those tools through personalized, strength-based approaches that honor your child's exceptional abilities while addressing their very real challenges.
The right support can improve your child’s academic outcomes, family relationships, and long-term outcomes, and the skills they develop now, through coaching, will serve them throughout their entire lives.
Every child deserves the opportunity to reach their full potential, and executive function coaching helps make that possibility a reality.
If you're ready to explore how executive function coaching can benefit your twice-exceptional child, check out our private coaching options at EF Specialists.
Your journey as a parent of a 2e child may be complex, but you're not walking it alone.
And remember: the investment in your child's executive function development now will pay dividends that last a lifetime.
FAQs
What age is best for starting executive function coaching?
Children as young as six can benefit from executive function coaching, though approaches differ significantly based on developmental stage.
Elementary-aged children typically focus on basic organization and routine-building through play-based activities, while high school coaching tends to focus more on independence-building.
The key factor isn't age but readiness.
How long before you see results with EF coaching?
Most families notice some positive changes within the first month of consistent coaching.
Children often report feeling less overwhelmed and more confident about managing their responsibilities.
Significant skill development typically occurs over three to six months of regular coaching.
How does EF coaching differ from therapy or tutoring?
Executive function coaching focuses specifically on skill development rather than academic content or emotional processing.
While there may be some overlap, each approach serves distinct purposes.
Many children benefit from combinations of these services.
A 2e child might work with a tutor for mathematics, a therapist for anxiety management, and a coach for executive function skills simultaneously.
Can coaching help with emotional regulation?
Executive function coaching addresses emotional regulation as it relates to task management and daily functioning.
Children learn strategies for managing frustration when they’re facing challenging tasks along with techniques for maintaining motivation during longer projects.
Coaches can also help children recognize early warning signs of emotional overwhelm and implement preventive strategies.
This might include taking breaks, using calming techniques, or modifying task approaches.
Is executive function coaching covered by insurance?
It depends.
Some insurance plans may cover coaching provided by licensed mental health professionals as part of treatment for ADHD or learning disabilities.
Private coaching is typically not covered by insurance unless it’s provided as part of a medical treatment plan.
How do I know if my child needs executive function coaching?
Signs that your child might benefit from coaching include consistent difficulty with organization, time management, or task completion despite adequate intelligence and motivation.
Academic performance that doesn't match your child's apparent ability often indicates executive function challenges.
This is particularly common in 2e children whose giftedness masks their support needs.
The Bottom Line
Twice-exceptional children shine with extraordinary talents while simultaneously struggling with executive function skills that make everyday tasks overwhelming.
Executive function coaching bridges this gap by teaching practical strategies for organization, time management, task initiation, and emotional regulation in ways that play to a child’s strengths.
With the right support, 2e kids can thrive academically, strengthen family relationships, and build the confidence they need for long-term success.
If you're ready to explore executive function coaching for your 2e child, check out our private coaching options at EF Specialists.
Hope this helps 🤙🏻
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P.S. If you want to work on executive function skills with your students, consider joining hundreds of other educators and parents who have completed my Semester Success Blueprint Course. In less than 2 hours, this comprehensive course will teach you and your student the system I developed to help hundreds of students learn how to manage school effectively and raise their self-awareness and engagement with school.
About Me
Hey! I'm Sean 👋
I'm a former public school special education teacher who realized that executive function skills are more important than knowing when George Washington crossed the Potomac.
Since then, I've made it my mission to teach anyone who will listen about how to develop these key life skills.
In 2020, I founded Executive Function Specialists to ensure all students with ADHD and Autism have access to high-quality online executive function coaching services. We offer online EF coaching and courses to help students and families.
Realizing I could only reach so many people through coaching, in 2021 I started the Executive Function Coaching Academy which trains schools, educators, and individuals to learn the key strategies to improve executive function skills for students.
In 2023, I co-founded of UpSkill Specialists, to provide neurodivergent adults with high-quality executive function coaching services.
When not pursuing my passions through work, I love spending time with my family, getting exercise, and growing my brain through reading. You can connect with me on LinkedIn.
Want me to speak on executive function skills at your event? Learn more about my speaking topics here.