How to Find a Parent Coach as a Parent of a Special Needs Child
- Sean McCormick
- 3 days ago
- 15 min read
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Finding the right parent coach when you have a special needs child feels like a monumental task, but it doesn't have to be.
By understanding your specific needs, avoiding common pitfalls like choosing the wrong fit, and using targeted resources, you can find a professional who empowers both you and your child.
Table of Contents
You’re navigating a world that often wasn't built for your child.
You’ve become an expert researcher.
A fierce advocate.
A scheduler of a million appointments.
You’re doing it all.
But sometimes, you feel like you’re doing it all alone.
Chances are, you’ve probably already heard about parent coaching.
Maybe you’ve wondered if it could really make a difference for your family.
This guide is your answer, designed to help you understand what a parent coach does.
And more importantly, it will show you exactly how to find the right one for you.
You deserve support that truly gets it.
Let’s find that for you.👇
Why Parent Coaching Matters
Parenting a child with special needs is a one-of-a-kind journey.
It’s filled with incredible joy.
It’s also filled with monumental challenges.
The emotional and mental load can be immense.
Research shows that parents of children with diverse learning needs report significantly higher levels of stress.
You’re overwhelmed, but you also feel constant pressure to make the right decisions. This isn't
You’re managing therapies, advocating at school, and navigating complex social situations.
You’re trying to support your child’s development while also caring for yourself.
It’s a balancing act that would test anyone.
A parent coach isn't just another appointment on your calendar.
Instead, they’re a strategic partner, providing you with the tools, strategies, and a non-judgmental space to process it all.
Think of a coach as a guide who has the map and the compass.
You're still the one climbing the mountain.
But now you have an expert helping you find the best path.
They can help you shift from constantly reacting to feeling proactive and empowered.
That shift can change everything for your family's dynamic.
It can improve your relationship with your child, reduce conflict in your home and give you back a sense of control and hope.
Finding the right coach is a strategic move for your family's well-being.
Where Parents Go Wrong in Finding a Coach
Finding the right support is undeniably important, but unfortunately, it’s incredibly easy to take a wrong turn.
Here are some common mistakes to steer clear of:
1. Choosing a Generalist Coach
You see a life coach who seems amazing.
They have great reviews and a polished website.
You think,
"They help people with goals, I have goals, this should work."
This is often the first misstep.
A general life coach can be fantastic for many things, but they likely don't have the specialized knowledge you need.
They may not understand the nuances of an IEP and might not be familiar with executive function challenges, sensory processing disorders, or the specific anxieties that come with your child’s diagnosis.
You’d spend your sessions explaining the basics.
You’d be educating your coach instead of receiving targeted support.
It’s like hiring a great family doctor to perform heart surgery.
They’re a skilled professional, but they don't have the specific expertise required for the job.
You need someone who already speaks your language and understands the full landscape of your child’s needs, right from day one.
2. Ignoring the "Fit" Factor
So, maybe you do find a coach who specializes in your child’s specific challenge.
Their resume is perfect.
They have all the right credentials.
You hire them on the spot.
But after a few sessions, something feels off.
Their communication style is too blunt, or maybe too gentle and their methods feel rigid and don't align with your family’s values.
You don’t feel truly seen or heard.
This is a huge mistake.
Coaching is an intensely personal relationship.
The "fit" between you and your coach is just as important as their qualifications.
You need to feel a sense of trust and rapport.
You should feel comfortable being vulnerable and honest.
If you’re holding back or feel judged, the coaching won’t be effective.
Don’t be afraid to "interview" potential coaches, asking them about their philosophy, about how they handle disagreements.
Pay attention to how you feel during the conversation.
Do you feel energized and understood?
Or do you feel drained and misunderstood?
Trust your gut.
The right coach will feel like an ally, not just a consultant.
3. Expecting the Coach to "Fix" Your Child
You hire a parent coach hoping they will give you a magic script.
A script that will make your child do their homework, stop having meltdowns, or magically develop missing skills.
You see the coach as someone who will solve your child’s problems.
But that’s not the primary role of a parent coach.
A parent coach’s client is you, the parent.
Their job is to empower you.
They give you the tools, strategies, and mindset shifts to create a supportive environment where your child can thrive.
The focus is on your parenting, your communication, and your approach.
Yes, this will have a massive positive impact on your child.
But the change starts with you.
When you shift your mindset to
"how can this coach support me in supporting my child?"
you open the door to real, sustainable progress.
You become the agent of change in your own family.
How To Find The Right Parent Coach For You
So, how do you find that just-right coach?
The one with the right expertise who also feels like the perfect partner?
It takes a methodical, heart-centered approach.
Step 1: Define Your "Why" and "What"
Before you even open a search browser, grab a notebook.
First, get clear on your "why."
Why are you seeking a coach right now?
Are you feeling burnt out and need coping strategies?
Are you struggling to get on the same page with your partner about parenting?
Are you facing a new challenge, like transitioning to middle school?
Write it all down. Be specific.
Next, define your "what."
What specific outcomes are you hoping for?
Do you want to learn how to de-escalate meltdowns?
Do you need help creating systems for homework and routines?
Are you looking for support in advocating for your child's needs at school?
Having this clarity is your compass.
It will prevent you from being swayed by impressive-looking profiles that don’t
actually address your core needs.
Your list becomes your filter for every coach you consider.
Step 2: Research with Intention
Now you can start your search.
But don’t just type "parent coach" into Google.
That will give you a sea of overwhelming results.
Be specific.
Use search terms like:
"Executive function coach for parents"
"Autism parenting support"
"Parent coach for learning disabilities"
This targeted search will narrow the field significantly.
One of the most effective ways to find qualified professionals is through a vetted directory, which will do the initial screening for you.
For example, the EFS Directory is curated to include specialists who truly understand the world of executive function and related challenges.
Using a trusted directory saves you time and increases your chances of finding a high-quality coach.
As you review profiles, check for credentials, but also for their philosophy.
Read their blog posts.
Watch their videos.
Do they resonate with you?
Do they seem to understand the reality of your day-to-day life?
Step 3: The "Chemistry Check" Call
You’ve narrowed it down to 2-3 promising candidates.
Now it's time for the most important step: the consultation call.
Most coaches offer a free introductory call, often called a discovery or chemistry call.
This is not a sales call.
It's a mutual interview.
Come prepared with questions based on your "Why" and "What" list.
Here are a few to get you started:
"Can you tell me about your experience working with parents of children with [your child's specific challenge]?"
"What is your coaching philosophy? What does a typical session look like?"
"How do you measure progress with your clients?"
"What would you do if we disagreed on a strategy?"
Listen carefully to their answers.
But also pay attention to how they make you feel.
Do you feel heard?
Do they ask thoughtful questions about your family?
Do you feel a spark of hope and energy?
Or do you feel like you're just another number?
Trust your intuition. The right coach will feel like a genuine connection.
Step 4: Clarify the Logistics
Once you feel good about the fit, get clear on the details.
Don't be shy about asking the practical questions.
What is the cost per session?
Do you offer packages? What’s included?
How long are the sessions and how frequent are they?
What is your policy for cancellations or rescheduling?
What kind of support is available between sessions? (e.g., email, text)
You might also want to inquire about what a typical parent coaching session might look like.
In general, sessions last between 45 and 60 minutes and may take place weekly or biweekly over video call or phone.
You’ll start by discussing current challenges (such as behavioral concerns, school issues, or family stress points) then work with your coach to set clear goals.
Your coach will introduce practical strategies, role-play difficult conversations, or help you build customized routines.
Often, sessions conclude with action steps and, sometimes, brief check-ins via email or text between appointments to troubleshoot or celebrate wins.
When you understand these details upfront, you prevent future misunderstandings.
You’re also making sure the coaching relationship is sustainable for you financially and logistically.
Finding the right coach is a process of alignment.
Aligning their expertise with your needs.
Aligning their personality with yours.
Aligning the logistics with your life.
When all three are in sync, you’ve found your partner for the journey ahead.
Comparing Parent Coaching Programs: Your Options, Explained
You might think all parent coaching looks the same.
You sign up. You talk. You get advice.
But the reality is much more varied.
Just like schools or therapies, coaching programs come in different shapes and sizes.
Finding the format that fits your lifestyle is key to sticking with it.
1. One-on-One Coaching
This is the gold standard for personalized support.
It’s just you and the coach.
Every session is dedicated 100% to your specific family dynamics.
You can dig deep into your unique challenges.
You can pivot quickly if a strategy isn't working.
It’s the most intensive option, and often the most expensive.
But for complex situations, the ROI can be life-changing.
2. Group Coaching
Here, you join a small cohort of other parents.
You meet regularly, usually online.
You learn from the coach, but also from each other.
It’s less personalized, but it offers something one-on-one doesn't: community.
You realize you aren't the only one dealing with morning meltdowns.
You feel less isolated.
It’s often more affordable than private coaching.
3. Online Courses with Support
Some programs are curriculum-based.
You watch videos or read modules on your own time.
Then, you have access to a coach for Q&A or feedback.
This is great for self-starters.
It also works well if you have a chaotic schedule and can't commit to a weekly appointment.
However, it requires more self-discipline to stay on track.
Parent Coaching Programs to Consider
Fortunately, there are all kinds of programs tailored for families, programs that just get it.
Here are a few options to get you started, but remember: every family is unique.
Trust your gut as you decide which one might offer the support you need:
ImpactParents: Specializes in coaching for parents of children with ADHD, anxiety, and related challenges. Their team includes certified coaches and expert parent educators, offering both private and group formats.
Parent to Parent USA: A national network that connects parents with experienced mentors for support, resources, and practical guidance, especially for families navigating disability or chronic health needs.
Bright & Quirky: Focused on parents raising twice-exceptional (2e) kids (those who are both gifted and challenged). Offers masterclasses, conferences, and coaching circles led by veteran professionals.
Parent Coaching Institute (PCI): Offers Parent Coach Certification® Training and individual parent coaching services. They also provide coaching services for companies and organizations.
Lifeline Child Parent Coaching: Designed for parents navigating challenging or confusing behaviors in their children, aiming to create positive change in family dynamics.
Parent Coaching vs. Other Support Options
It’s easy to get confused by the alphabet soup of support services.
Is a coach a therapist? Is an advocate a consultant?
Let’s break down who does what and who’s who so you can build the right team.
Parent Coach vs. Therapist
Therapists look backward and inward.
They treat mental health conditions like depression or trauma. They ask "Why do you feel this way?"
Coaches look forward and outward. They focus on action.
They ask "What are we going to do about this challenge today?"
Parent Coach vs. Educational Advocate
An advocate fights for your child's rights in school.
They know the laws. They sit in IEP meetings to make sure the school is compliant.
A coach helps you manage the stress of that IEP meeting.
They help you build the confidence to speak up. They support the home side of the equation.
Parent Coach vs. Consultant
Consultants are information experts, ones who might evaluate your child and give you a report of recommendations.
Coaches are partners, unlike consultants who often just give you a report and leave.
They walk beside you as you implement the changes, troubleshooting along the way.
How to Evaluate a Parent Coach’s Credentials
Unlike doctors or psychologists, the term "coach" isn't strictly regulated.
Technically, anyone can wake up tomorrow and call themselves a parent coach.
That’s scary.
But it just means you need to be a savvy consumer.
Here is what to look for to ensure you’re hiring a pro.👇
Certification Matters
Look for coaches certified by reputable organizations.
Examples include the International Coaching Federation (ICF) or specialized programs like the ADD Coach Academy (ADDCA).
This shows they’ve undergone rigorous training.
It proves they adhere to a code of ethics.
Specialized Experience
General life coaching credentials are great.
But you need more.
Does the coach have specific training in neurodiversity?
Do they have a background in special education, psychology, or social work?
Real-world experience with special needs is non-negotiable.
Testimonials and References
Don’t just take their word for it.
Read what other parents are saying.
Look for stories that sound like yours.
"They helped us stop the yelling."
"I finally understand my child's brain."
If a coach is hesitant to share success stories (while protecting privacy, of course), that’s a huge red flag.
Common Myths About Parent Coaching
Now, let’s bust some of the major myths that might be holding you back.
Myth 1: "I only need a coach if I'm a bad parent."
False.
You hire a personal trainer because you want to get stronger, not because you’re a "bad" human.
Elite athletes have coaches. CEOs have coaches.
Hiring a coach means you’re a dedicated, ambitious parent who wants the best tools available.
Myth 2: "It’s too expensive."
It is an investment.
But think about the cost of not getting help.
The cost of family stress. The cost of missed work due to school crises. The cost of strained relationships.
Is it still too expensive?
Also, many coaches offer sliding scales or group options to make it accessible.
Myth 3: "A coach will tell me what to do."
A bad coach might.
A great coach helps you figure out what to do.
They know that you are the expert on your child.
They facilitate your wisdom. They don't dictate your life.
How to Prepare For Your First Parent Coaching Session
You booked the session. Now what?
It’s normal to feel a mix of excitement and nerves.
But here’s how to show up ready to work.
1. Be Honest
This is a judgment-free zone.
If you yelled at your kids yesterday, say it.
If you’re hiding in the bathroom to eat chocolate, admit it.
Your coach can't help the "Instagram version" of your family. They can only help the real one.
2. Pick One Priority
You probably have 50 things you want to fix.
Don’t try to boil the ocean in hour one.
Pick the one thing that is causing the most pain right now.
Maybe it’s the morning routine. Maybe it’s screen time battles.
Start there.
3. Be Open to Change
You’re hiring a coach because the old way isn't working.
That means you have to be willing to try a new way.
It might feel uncomfortable at first. That’s okay.
Growth happens outside your comfort zone.
Other Resources to Help You on Your Journey
Your coaching journey is just one piece of the puzzle.
Here are a few other places to find support and information.
CHADD (Children and Adults with Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder) offers incredible resources and local support groups.
Understood.org is home to a vast library of articles and tools for learning and thinking differences.
Your Local Parent Center, funded by the Department of Education, provides free training and assistance to families of children with disabilities.
The EFS Directory is the best place to connect with specialized executive function coaches and professionals who understand your specific needs.
FAQs
How do I know if I'm ready for a parent coach?
You’re ready if you feel stuck and are open to trying new approaches. You’re ready if you recognize that your own mindset and actions impact your child. If you’re looking for a quick fix or someone to change your child for you, you might not be ready. Coaching requires you to be an active participant in your family's growth.
How much does parent coaching cost?
The cost can vary depending on the coach’s experience, credentials, and location. On average, sessions range from $100 to $250 per hour. Some coaches offer discounted package rates for purchasing multiple sessions upfront, while others may have flexible payment options or group coaching at a lower cost.
Be sure to ask about pricing, what’s included, cancellation policies, and whether there are additional fees for resources or between-session support.
Can a parent coach work with my child's school or therapist?
Absolutely. A great parent coach can be a key player on your child’s support team. With your permission, they can collaborate with teachers, therapists, and other professionals. This creates a consistent and cohesive support system for your child across all environments.
How long does parent coaching usually last?
It varies widely depending on your goals. Some parents work with a coach for a few months to tackle a specific issue, like homework battles. Others maintain a long-term relationship for ongoing support as their child grows and faces new developmental stages. A good coach will discuss a potential timeline with you upfront.
What concerns do most parents have before starting coaching?
It’s normal to feel nervous or unsure about starting parent coaching. Common concerns include whether coaching will be effective, how private your conversations are, or if you’ll be judged. As a parent, you may also want to know if your situation is “too complicated” or different from other families.
A good coach will reassure you that coaching is a safe, confidential space, not a source of criticism. Remember, there’s no “perfect” parent and no one-size-fits-all solution. Coaches are there to support, not to judge.
The Bottom Line
You don't have to set out on this journey alone.
The right parent coach can turn your feelings of overwhelm into feelings of accomplishment, providing you with a personalized playbook of strategies that work for your family.
They give you a safe space to be human, to be frustrated, and to find your strength again.
Investing in a parent coach is an investment in your own well-being.
And when you’re supported, regulated, and confident, you create the best possible environment for your child to flourish.
Your child’s success is deeply connected to your own, and taking the step to find a coach is a powerful act of love for both of you.
Ready to find that perfect partner for your parenting journey?
Explore the EFS Directory to connect with vetted specialists who understand your world.
And if you’re feeling unsure where to start, book an inquiry call with our team.
We can help you understand our coaching options and find the right path for your student and your family.
Hope this helps 🤙🏻
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P.S. If you want to work on executive function skills with your students, consider joining hundreds of other educators and parents who have completed my Semester Success Blueprint Course. In less than 2 hours, this comprehensive course will teach you and your student the system I developed to help hundreds of students learn how to manage school effectively and raise their self-awareness and engagement with school.
About Me
Hey! I'm Sean 👋
I'm a former public school special education teacher who realized that executive function skills are more important than knowing when George Washington crossed the Potomac.
Since then, I've made it my mission to teach anyone who will listen about how to develop these key life skills.
In 2020, I founded Executive Function Specialists to ensure all students with ADHD and Autism have access to high-quality online executive function coaching services. We offer online EF coaching and courses to help students and families.
Realizing I could only reach so many people through coaching, in 2021 I started the Executive Function Coaching Academy which trains schools, educators, and individuals to learn the key strategies to improve executive function skills for students.
In 2023, I co-founded of UpSkill Specialists, to provide neurodivergent adults with high-quality executive function coaching services.
When not pursuing my passions through work, I love spending time with my family, getting exercise, and growing my brain through reading. You can connect with me on LinkedIn.
Want me to speak on executive function skills at your event? Learn more about my speaking topics here.